I just finished reading this book by Amy Chua. It's about a rather controversial Chinese way of parenting that even as a Singaporean Chinese, I find it very extreme as well. In the book, Amy (the mother) forces her children to practice violin and piano for long hours. Of course, her two children are musically talented and can play really well on the instrument. Amy's second daughter, Louisa aka Lulu, is well, more rebellious than her elder sister Sophia. But my whole point is that, is Chinese parenting the best way to raise your child? As a Chinese teenager brought up by Chinese parents, I must agree that my mother played a huge role in my childhood. I was "forced" to bring small packets of Apollo cake to primary school to eat during recess. I hated those cakes, it was horrible. My mother had warned me that she would know if I threw away any of those cakes. Foolishly, I actually believed her words and I kept those cakes in my file. After a few weeks, my file grew larger and larger and my mum could smell a rat. She opened my file and to her horror, found many packets of cake squashed between my papers. Busted. I was caned if I didn't remember wrongly.
It has always been a Chinese way of parenting I suppose, to cane, to threaten and to scold your kids whenever they disobey you. My mum would often bribe me to do things and well it turns out to be an empty promise after all. She would threaten to cane me if I did not obey her and would even go crazy if I broke/lost something. But in the end, I still love my mum no matter what. Today is Mother's Day and it dawned upon me that all these years when I was still in primary school and even up till I was Sec 4, I always held a grudge against her. I some how hated her. I always admired other kids' mum. I wanted them to be my mother as they're nice and do not scold their kids publicly. But now at 17, I really treasure my mum a lot. She has taught me everything to survive and though I disagree with what she does sometimes and is rather embarrassed by her actions at times, I still love her. She may be loud, demanding and definitely not a great cook, but she is my mum and I love her for all these imperfections.
She may not be the best mum out there but she's my mum and to me she's just great being who she is. She may like to play mahjong a lot and it disturbs me but I know that I'm going to miss the sound of shuffling tiles when I go overseas to study in the future. I may dislike her horrible porridge but I'll miss her cooking somehow or the other. She may be loud and her voice can be heard ten miles away but I'll miss her calling me from far asking me to do things in the future.
I'll treasure my family more and especially my mother. She has been there with me all these while, looking after me, the Chinese way (though not as strict as Amy Chua with her kids).
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY MA!
This photo was taken in 2007/8. It's been so long since we had a family trip together. It has been individual trips overseas these few years. Hopefully we can go somewhere this year as a family but my mum always says that she has been to many places already and it's not worthwhile visiting the same place multiple times.